Saturday, August 29, 2009

Vegas


Do you know how Vegas got built? That’s right. Vegas got built by you going to their $300/night room, for which you pay $50, sitting down at the tables drinking free beer, all the while being served by the waitress and dealer who are being paid by the $1 billion air conditioned casino.

And You Win.

That’s right, you are going to Vegas, and you are going to win money. Can you believe there are people who actually think this?

Yep, I’m one of them. When I first went to Vegas I became excited. I had a few hundred dollars to spend, and as they say, that was a lot of money back then. Especially for me.

You’ll never guess. I lost all my money. And the poor dealer. We stopped at the Hacienda Casino, (it used to be at the edge of Vegas when you first drove in, but has long ago been torn down), sat down at a $2 blackjack table and proceeded to gamble. At $2, it’s hard to lose money fast. And with free beers and going through a pack of cigarettes in a few hours, if that dealer didn’t get cancer from second hand smoke, well, than there is no such thing.

My wife and are going again this week. We relax. I’ll do my work-out at 24 Hour Fitness, then we’ll walk around and hang out by the pool. Nothing earth shaking. We don’t gamble.

People look at us like we’re crazy. You go to Vegas, and don’t gamble. Well, duh, yeah, we’re not that stupid.

Though Vegas is synonymous with gambling, a more enjoyable time can be had not gambling. Gambling is a waste of time. It’s more enjoyable (and sadistic) to watch the other stupid bastards lose their money. That’s actually the most fun about Vegas, watching others lose. Especially when they shouldn’t be gambling to begin. And then watching them go to the ATM machine on the casino floor and get rejected trying to get more money.

Fact: For every dollar gambled in Vegas, the house gets $.08

Maybe that's what the Government should do: Look at their hand, realize they have no chance in hell, and fold.

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